PROUD MEN

Phone Conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

Dry cleaners and hair cutters don't rob you blind.

You don't have to learn to spell a new last name.

You can leave the motel bed unmade.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be friends

If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

You can quietly watch TV with your buddy for hours without thinking: "He must be mad at me."

Same work...more pay.

Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.

You don't mooch off other's desserts.

You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.

If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit you just might become lifelong friends.

You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

At least a few belches are expected and tolerated.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

Deepavali shopping can be accomplished for family on last day in 45 minutes